We might think back to our pasts and give our carers a score out of ten to measure how things went. It isn’t unfair or mean sometimes - in the privacy of our own minds - to hold people to account. Finish the sentence, "My Parent made me' below and give each a score out of 10.
My parent made me:
- feel deeply loved and wanted.
- Was often highly attuned to what I actually felt
- Was able to tolerate a degree of innocent disobedience
- Was authentically happy about my success
- Lacked sadistic impulses
- Avoided imposing too many of their own issues on me
- Didn’t demand to be admired
- Wasn’t too exciting
- Knew how to play
- Had boundaries
- Tolerated dissent
- Took an interest in my ‘small’ joys and pains
We don’t need a score of a hundred and twenty to be robust, but if things were to drop much below sixty, there might be grounds for a good deal of reflection and sorrow.
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FURTHER READING
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“Some people assume that you can’t really say what a good — or indeed a bad — parent actually is. But we don’t agree. So we’ve designed a checklist of what we think makes up a good parent…”
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CREDITS
Produced in collaboration with:
Gemma Green-Hope
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Sarah Hope
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Title animation produced in collaboration with
Vale Productions
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